So......find a new profession they say. Well it's not a new profession but it will be my lock down goal. To design a 'poo bag' that is easy to open and make my life easier when walking Hershial. (By the way Hershial is Harry in jewish. One of my friends calls him that) So now that he is Hershial we will have to be circumcised. Oh no not the cone of shame again. Also the poor thing can't afford to loose any more of his private parts. Ok he can stay a gentile. Maybe I'll have him barmitzvahed when he is 13. Anyway back to the poo bag. Those of you who have a dog will know how difficult it is to get the bag out of it's little plastic holder (especially with gloves on) and then find the end where it opens. Now you need to lick your fingers to get it open and in these times that is not advisable. So as you struggle to open it Harry is standing looking at me. Even after about 1468 poos he still doesn't know why I have to pick it up. I suppose that is understandable. Can you imagine your wife standing by your side in the toilet waiting to pick up your shit. So as I said my goal is to be able to pull the bag out of a receptacle and it opens automatically. I have heard of a pooper scooper that you can place over the poo and it grabs the poo up and you can through it away. But I haven't found one yet.
Right that's my future sorted. What else has Hershial been doing. Well I'm afraid he is a kleptomaniac . He gets a kick out of stealing anything he can find. He goes into jacket pockets and steals gloves, masks, tissues. Oh yes he loves to eat tissues. He finds them in the street and carries them in his mouth till he gets home and swallows them. He doesn't seem to have any taste buds either. We spend fortunes on Butterbox food (liver beef lamb) but he eats horse shit. What is the point.
He is such a part of the family now. I said to Jane would you sell him for a million pounds. She said not ever for 10 million pounds. I said would you sell me for a million pounds. She said I'd give you away for nothing ......nice.
At least I now know where all the odd sox are going. Battersea Dog home.
Bye xxx
Comments